By Staff Writer Slim Jimmy from Sparta

August 1st, 2025, Muskegon, MI – Local Legend, Slippery Steve tricked a merman onto a rock near the shoreline in Muskegon last week. We here at GR Chronic were stoked to hear that he was able to snap this groovy photograph. It’s still unconfirmed if the merman survived, but either way, it sparked conversation within the community. And, in some cases, controversy.

“Slippery Steve is a lying slut!” exclaimed a local resident who asked to remain anonymous. That resident, Wet Jonny, went on to state that Mr Slippery was caught pulling a fast one at The Bob. Wet Jonny said, “Sure, The Bob sucks, but like,” the anonymous resident (Wet Jonny) paused and then said, “I don’t know, I was gonna say stealing is bad, but fuck capitalism, honestly.”

No matter your opinion on Slippery Steve, we here at The GR Chronic are proud to be the first ever to report factual evidence that mermaids (or at least mermen) are real.

This is Staff Writer, Slim Jimmy from Sparta, signing off.